Superman goes to England

So he said, ever since I can remember, I have always felt invincible; unbreakable even. This feeling is not there all the time though. Like superman, some villain may have kryptonite and I may feel vulnerable. That villain could be a person or a situation. But, just like superman, I prevail in the end just before the credits roll up.

Lately the kryptonite is powerful and is possessed by many villains.

First I missed my flight by a whole day. With no clue whatsoever, I even call the airline to complain and it takes about 5 minutes for them to make me understand that my flight was for the day before.

Then I get here 2 days late and, after a glowing introduction, my presentation bombs out in a style only Bill Gates would understand from his days launching dodgy software.

As in any good episode of superman, it usually gets worse before it gets better. Is it going to get any worse? How much worse can it get. Today it was the University of Liverpool and the department of Chemical and Microbiology. Easy to explain away the glitch using big IT words. But next week it is the University of Oxford Computer Science professors. My guess is that the kryptonite will be found in the content. The professors will be frowning and trying to make up excuses for me.

She says I should be drenched in sweat at the prospect of backfiring again. But superman usually ends up kissing a hot chic at the end (unless it is one of those stupid – to be continued – episodes). So I am now focusing on what form the hot chic at the end will take for me.  This may be the most exciting superman episode yet, but it is not a season finale and neither is it the season opener. As such, superman will not die in this episode nor stay injured till the next.

She says she would like to be the hot chic at the end when I am in this mood.

What is the true cost of good customer service?

So she said;

Am kind of impressed with Umeme. I reached home last night and found no kara. I called the chaps and directed them to our area. They actually came to the rescue and sorted us out and even called to confirm that power was back. At this juncture I am glad to be a shareholder.

But he said;
 


Am still glad I am not a shareholder. Do you for instance happen to know WHY the power was off? It merely takes an accomplice to turn off a circuit breaker, log your call as a complaint then requisition 'materials' for repair. This in addition to fuel for 'going to site' since a shareholder has called. From this fuel they allow the pump attendant 5k of the 30k ghost fuel as well as justify the need for a multitude of technicians (basing on the no of complaints received from previous years' records), increased number of call center staff to receive these complaints.... and it goes on and on perpetuating itself. The end result to me, the ordinary mwananchi? Is a higher power bill, as UMEME seeks profits which translate into higher prices of local goods... This leads to lousy imports from China choking local business because the natural mingis that are involved in the imports don’t pay taxes...... I could complete a full 32 page kasuku explaining just how terrible that 'wonderful' customer service is for you and I but it’s cyclic and would still not end. For God and my country!
 
Think about the real cost of customer service next time you dial 0800185185.

Is Kenya really better than Uganda?

It is interesting the amount of comparison that goes on between people in life and yet many of the races we run are or should be with ourselves. From the positions in school; I have a friend whose son has been scarred for life because he is always the last in a class of 20, despite an average of 80%. Now he has no interest in school because he is convinced he can never win.

So she looks enviously at neighbor Kenya and its recently opened metro station and flyovers, and the planned silicon valley project. She complains loudly about how useless we are in comparison because of all the dust in our city and corruption everywhere. As far as she is concerned Kenya is better than Uganda.

So let us examine this Kenya that is turning out to be our role model or pace setter. After independence they were ruled by a chap who considered himself the only one with a vision. In fact he had fought for independence based on this conviction. When he died, his chosen successor continued with his vision leading to this sole vision being in control for close to 40 years. During that time the level of corruption in Kenya was such that Kenyatta's family is still considered one of the richest in Africa.

I think Kaguta studied that formula well. His sole vision is now entering 26 years and soon a handpicked successor should be in place to keep that going. I think with oil coming, the levels of corruption will soon match those of the visionary Kenyans. Already the travails of Bassajabala are looking very similar to those of that Muyindi from the Goldenburg scandal.

In short, what He is saying is that we shall soon have flyovers, metro trains and hi-tech cities too. Just as long as Kagu continues to bless us with his vision. Long live Kaguta and long live the NRM. Down with unpatriotic Ugandans allowing to be used by foreigners to derail us.

He is laughing so loudly that his side hurts. She said he is stupid...

Uganda Oil Debate

So she said...

For some reason, I was taking a critical look at the quality of Uganda (and Kenya) oil and this time I didn’t let my dislike for Kagu cloud my head. Tested samples of Ug oil is actually described as  sweet and waxy. Now the quality of crude (and therefore it’s commercialblity is) is graded as follows:
1) How vicious is the product (ability to flow with heating)?
2) What is gravity (density) of the product. (Density compared to water)?
3) What is sulphur content of the product. (Sour or sweet)- One of the needs of refining is to get of sulphur form finished product, since sulphur is very bad to engines and to humans.
Now UG’s oil ranks well on the sulphur spec. It’s crude is considered SWEET. It avg sulphur ranges btwn 0.1% to 0.2%. Industry standard is anything above 0.5% is considered high sulphur.  That implies sulphur levels in Ugandan crude are some of the lowest in the world, the simple meaning (which is govt position) is that a refinery processing Ugandan crude would have the advantage of requiring less investment in desulpherisation units, making the refinery potentially more profitable- (Although I would regard that too simplistic an analysis and conclusion!)
On the other two specs API (density) and Viscosity, UG’s crude wouldn’t be ranked among the world’s best. UG/Kenya crude API ranges between 24-33 deg. Anything above 30 deg is considered HEAVY.  On the viscosity, UG’s oil is heavily viscous (HEAVY & WAXY). It basically doesn’t flow at room temperature and must be kept at temperatures not less than 60˚C to maintain flowing and prevent wax deposition in pipelines. For it to be pourable, it must be kept at least at 40˚C.- (This again is the argument of the govt against building a pipeline for export- that it will be expensive)- Again I say this a simplistic way of looking at it.   
So, my take is this:

1.       Govt has a valid a point to consider refinery built

2.       Oil companies have valid point to export (this basis refinery economics viability vs exports economics- this I will discuss in detail another time)

3.       My main concern in this is that UG reserves are quite limited 3.5m bbls. These could run out in 25-35 years (like what happened to Dubai). So if not well managed, our children, grandchildren will never see benefit of this oil before it runs out. Dubai run out of oil, as they had limited reserves (maybe close to +4mbbls) but they had the foresight to use oil revenues to guaranteed in flows after oil had run out.

So he said...
I have always been of the view that the person who is important is the person closest to me. I have thus always been narrow minded in my view of potential benefits. The fact is the world will never be fair and we shall not find ourselves all happy and singing kumbaya until we reach heaven.

I will use Nigeria as an example because it is well known that those guys have severely misused their oil wealth. Nigeria is not Uganda by any stretch of the imagination. They have one of the biggest economies in Africa. Their infrastructure and cities are far better than what we have in East Africa. As such I would very much like for Uganda to have more of what Nigeria has. My needs are simple. All I want is a good road to my house and electricity most of the time. Considering my current income level in Uganda, which I think is middle class, there is every likelihood (unless God forsakes me in a big way) that I will continue to remain in the middle class. Remember I said my needs are simple, as such being rich is a nice to have, but not essential to my life.

There is absolutely no amount of thuggery that can take place that will prevent me from being better off because of the oil, IF it starts flowing in my time. I cannot speak for my kids and it will be up to them to sort themselves. I leave other people to worry about ending poverty in Uganda. I will concentrate on avoiding poverty of Magero.

Its a new year

So it is 2013 finally. They say it is going to be worse that 2012. The good thing is that I am already in the brace position ready for the crash.

Right now I am a single parent. Yes, the wife went off to bang kyeyo. My opinion is that she is on a paid holiday as parenting these kids is not simple. But it has given me a chance to try out all my theories on parenting without the benefit of contrary feedback from the wife.

When my 2 year old spills anything on the floor, I send her to get a rug and mop it up. Subsequently the amount of spills has reduced dramatically. When any of my kids hurt themselves and start to cry, I wait for them to come to me seeking comfort rather than running over to find out what happened. Now there is less crying due to simple knocks. Soon I will start to send my 6 year old to the distant super market on her own.

The interesting thing is that most of my peers think that I am being mean. But they are the same people praising my kids for being so independent and mature. They like the end but not the means. Personally I just wanted to try giving them the sort of childhood I had. As such I have not invented anything new. My childhood was great and I think it made me the person that I am. So it should be obvious that I would want the same for my kids.

And let us be clear, he did not say that you should all do as I do. What he said is that this way is working for him. My oldest, she said; '... with daddy we do whatever we want. But with mummy there is too much shouting and smacking.' She forgets that he smacks too.

She said I was a bad father...

The other day my friend Joyce asked for me to take my oldest daughter Dominique to her house for a play date with her daughter Thandiwe. Since Joyce lives only 5 minutes walk away, I decided to send the girl on a boda boda. When the girl arrived, I expected gratitude; instead I got a lecture about my parenting. Apparently it is unsafe to send a 4 year old girl child on a boda ridden by a man. She said I was a bad parent.

When I was growing up my best friend lived 20 minutes walk from my house and there were no mobile phones and we did not even have that landline. Child sacrifice existed even then. I am sure many of you remember the story of the large ship that was said to be docked at the Indian Ocean trying to collect 1000 kids’ heads. But my parents let me walk to my best friend’s house everyday. And even today I still see kids younger than my Dominique walking to schools that are further away than 20 minutes.

So what is wrong with these so called corporates of today? If there is no wall fence, they will not live there. And yet Museveni brought peace and stability. Nowadays that sound in the night is fireworks not bullets. But back in the insecure days when we were being so badly governed that Museveni was compelled to go to the bush to rescue us, fences were organic and could be used as Christmas trees. I so feel sorry for my Dominique. Now she has one friend outside school and she only sees her on pre-arranged play dates. As a child growing up in Nsambya estate, I had a gang of friends. We made up a football team with subs and reserves. The same was true when we moved to Kamwokya. But now, not only do you have play dates, but if you want to play outside, you also have to pay for the venue where you play. Dominique only recently started riding her bicycle in our small compound. At her age I used to push my wire car all over Nsambya and Kabalagala. But that has become mentally impossible now. I say mentally because the problem is in our heads. I still see kids doing what I was doing growing up, but probably their parents are not middle class like me. Back then my parents were middle class and I still pushed wire cars all over Kampala.

I remember my parents chose the school we went to based on the efficiency of the school run. The idea was to have all the kids in one school. So when my elder sister only passed the interview at Buganda Road, it became the school of choice for the rest of us. Now schools are chosen based on how many 4s they get. If it is not 4s then it is class size. Most of my classes in Buganda Road had over 100 pupils. Granted I did not get 4 and neither did any of my sisters or even my wife, but we still learnt enough to be middle class today. Besides in a global crowded world, should we not be teaching our kids how to elbow their way through the crowd. But also when I look around at all the people who got 4s in my year, only one of them is rich enough for me to envy. Mostly they are doctors who after work in a hospital, head off to some clinic or the other to top up. Plus they also work on the weekend. The few that earn a decent salary are not even practicing medicine anymore. I do not want that for my kids. But when I remember those who did so poorly that they were told they would drop out in S4, I see many of them driving big cars; I even met one at the airport going on holiday to Barbados, while I was trying to show off with my work trip to Dar es Salaam. I want all that for my kids.

For this reason I have decided that it is not important how many 4s a school gets. Who is to say that my Dominique and her siblings will not be one of the few 4s in whatever school they go to? And even if they do not get 4, they will have avoided a life of poverty as a doctor in Uganda. My kids should go to a school that is close to my work, so that we optimize the school run. I stay in Kiwatule and work in Mulago and so I will not even have to pay extra on transport if they get into Kitante primary school. In her second term there, I will expect Dominique to walk over to my work place after school and wait for me, so that I do not have to get out of the taxi at Kitante to pick her up. She will be only 6 years old and I expect Joyce to withdraw her friendship in protest at this.

Since I cannot force my neighbors to tear down their wall fences, I have also decided that we shall only live in enclosures with several families with kids. I have friends who live in flats and their son is doing it like we used to. He regularly returns home with bruises and scrapes. They did not know that he was able to ride a bicycle without stabilizers. My parents did not even know that I could ride a bicycle from age 4; only finding out when I was in P7. My sister discovered her young daughter could walk when the maid found her in the neighbor’s banana plantation. Another friend of mine living in Bugolobi was shocked to find that his son’s gang had adopted a mongrel puppy. Now that is a childhood I want for my Dominique and her siblings.

Yes we can!! And we shall.

“He has made us competent as ministers of a new covenant—not of the letter but of the Spirit; for the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life.”- 2 Corinthians 3:6

In this verse Paul is talking about not sticking to the letter of the law but the spirit of it, because it is the spirit of it that enables us to put the law into our context.

The letter (through research by a renowned scientist) said that the black race was inferior even genetically. But the spirit said, 'Yes we can!' Joe Lewis showed Hitler that we could. Tiger Woods pointed golf in the right direction. Lewis Hamilton put some color into F1 and now Obama rules the world.

The spirit says we are all children of good. No Jews or Gentiles. Joe Lewis, Tiger Woods, Lewis Hamilton and Barrack Husein Obama are all mixed race people. Now that there is further proof of our oneness.